It's not fair!!!

How many times have we ever said that to ourselves?! It's not fair that she can eat all that greasy, delicious food and not gain and ounce and I smell a cupcake a gain a pound! It's not fair that my cousin wore her pre-pregnancy jeans out of the hospital two days after giving birth! Its's not fair that she doesn't struggle with lustful thoughts! It's not fair that they can afford a bigger, more luxurious house and they do the same work we do! The "it's not fair" list can go on and on and on.....that's how we as humans think. 

However after reading chapter 10 of the Made to Crave study this week my eyes were opened to something that is going to tame those not fair thoughts. One of the authors friends had an insight that I thought spoke directly the heart of this issue. 

"When I get caught up I how unfair it is that My friend is skinny and does t have to work at it, how she can eat what she wants when she wants, and how much it stinks that I can't be like her, I remind myself that God didn't make me to be her. You see, He knew even before I was born that I could easily allow food to be an idol in my life, that I would go to food instead of to Him, to fulfill my needs. And in His great wisdom, He created my body so that it would experience the consequences of sucha choice, so that I would emotionally be drawn back into His arms. He wants me to come to Him for fulfillment,emotional healing, comfort----and if I could go to food for that and never gain and ounce, well then, what would I need God for??"

Boy was this truth spoken directly to my heart! God knew my struggles before I was even born!!! He created me and allowed these struggles so it would draw me back to Him, not to be unfair to me. His is because he loves me so much. How awesome is that?!

So the next time I want to say "that isn't fair!" I will reflect on it as God's amazing love for me and His love call back to His heart and arms! 

Delighting in Obedience

It was the spring of 2010 and now was the moment of truth.....had the last 6 months of hard worth on Weight watchers paid off???? As I stepped on the scale I saw a number I hadn't seen since high school when I was an active-involved teenager with a relatively low stress level. I had actually gone beyond my goal weight!!!! I got off the scale and did a happy little dance resembling a clumsy version of Riverdance! I quickly texted my husband and posted my news to the world of Facebook. I was so proud in that moment and felt like I could conquer the world. That summer I was able to fit into sizes I had only dreamed of before and was so elated when trying on clothes on the annual girls shopping trip in Chicago. I felt beautiful and on top of the world. 

Then the numbers weren't coming off anymore. I was following my Weigh Watchers plan but I was plateauing. The all of a sudden I began gaining back some of the weight I had lost. What was going on? It turns out I began rewarding myself more often than not because I thought since I was finally at my goal weight I could relax off the plan for a while. This didn't pay off in the long run however. I had also begun a regiment of infertility medicine that also increased my weight gain again. So what did I do??? I gave up and the weight returned bringing a few extra pounds with it. 

So here I am in the winter of 2014 committing myself to discipline with food. I began Weight watchers again and so far have lost a few pounds. However this time the intentions are different. This time I want to discipline myself for a different reason.....because it will be pleasing to God! God calls us to crave Him above all and to follow His desire for us! He wants me to control my cravings and eat things that are healthy and good. 

As I was reading chapter 8 of the Made to Crave bible study I was challenged to ask myself these questions before I get on the scale each week....

Did I overreact this week on any day?

Did I move more and exercise regularly?

Do I feel lighter than I did last week?

Did I eat I secret or out of anger or frustation?

Did I feel that at any time I ran to food instead of to God?

Before hopping on this scale do I think I had a successful god-pleasing week?? 

These are the questions I need to worry about instead of the number. I need to define myself by obidience and not by a number on the scale (or size of my clothes for that matter)! 

I need a scale like this....

I think I should do this to my scale as a reminder - along with some scripture!

I have to remember God gave me this body as a gift and He does not make junk! I will never look like the models and celebrities on the covers of People and Vogue. There is no magical airbrush artist following me around so I have to make peace with my body. I want to treat my body as a temple and place only that which is good into it. I went to be beautiful on the inside and out. But the inside really is what shines through making the outside glow and sparkle! So to define myself and challenge myself I am going to go for obeying God, not just with food but other areas in my life, As I go through the rest of this week and the rest of my journey through this study I want to put my mind and heart in God's hands because he truly sees the important things in me..... Starting with obidience to Him!